Because Everything Is Cute Until It Poops
March 20th, 2007
Poop.
Bird poop.
Does this scenario sound familiar?
Girl has an insanely productive Saturday.
Girl gets up early after amazing night’s sleep. Girl walks to coffee shop and has latte, reads paper, arrives back at home before all her friends are awake.
Girl goes grocery shopping. Girl cleans bathroom and pays bills (the two are synonymous with deplorable tasks.) Girl checks time and realizes it’s only noon – her friends still aren’t up.
Girl decides to get oil changed, and in an overwhelming shower of affection for her super cute coupe, girl pulls into her neighborhood car wash and pops for the Ultra-Mega-Supreme Wash with Bio-Poly Luxe Wax and Spot Free Polish.
Girl checks watch and notes it’s only 3:00 – plenty of time to get a mani-pedi and take her time getting ready before she picks friends up in said coupe for din din at that hot new tapas & wine bar.
Girl strolls out of mani-pedi salon and notices something strange about her car. From a distance – she sees an odd splotch on her hood…almost reflecting the sunlight. As girl gets closer to her car, girl understands exactly what it is.
Poop.
Bird poop.
And girl’s insanely fabulous and productive Saturday along with her Ultra-Mega washed super cute coupe are all ruined.
Let’s make sure none of us have to endure such a cruel scenario again.
Keep the Auto Bird Turd Emergency Kit in your car at all times, and you can avoid the icky mess caused by disrespectful fowl, which only happens exactly when you don’t want it to.
The deets:
- Water bottle and windshield wiper to loosen and clean
- Shop towels to wipe up the mess
- Plastic baggies to store trash until it can be properly disposed
- Cleaner wax to better clean and protect the attacked area
- Microfiber sponge and towel to apply and remove cleaner wax
- Antibacterial wipes to restore that fresh and clean feeling.
- Perfect gift for a good friend
- Gorgeous gift-wrapping availble
Discuss this item (11 comments)
“I am in LOVE!! I just bought a new car and I'm obsessed with keeping those dang city birds away from my cute VW. Yay for the Auto Bird Turd Emergency Kit!”
Varien
March 20th, 2007 at 9:08 am
As we were walking across St. Mark’s Square in Venice after my sister’s wedding, her husband found himself in great need of such a kit. Sadly, he didn’t think ahead (nor was he in a car). The Italians call this sort of thing “lucky,” I call it “hilarious.”
March 20th, 2007 at 9:40 am
omg! this is the funniest! I live in LA and my car is my haven so I must, must get one of these.
March 20th, 2007 at 9:55 am
I never thought poop could be so funny.
March 20th, 2007 at 12:25 pm
OMG! What an idea! I’d be a grumpy girl too if a bird doo landed on my car.
March 20th, 2007 at 12:51 pm
I have a convertible. Does it come with shampoo?
March 20th, 2007 at 12:59 pm
No, no shampoo. But if you’re continuously getting hit directly on the head with bird poop while driving, you need much more than the Auto Bird Turd Emergency kit, my friend.
March 20th, 2007 at 1:48 pm
Now that I live in Denver and don’t have a use for my earthquake kit anymore…maybe this will have to replace it!
March 21st, 2007 at 7:05 am
now that it’s spring I think I really need this
March 21st, 2007 at 7:53 am
I just checked out your new site. I’ve been reading your newsletter for a few months now - your site looks awesome! I can see I’ll be shopping here a lot! Delightful!
March 23rd, 2007 at 7:53 am
AWESOME! I actually laughed out loud:)
April 11th, 2007 at 4:34 am
Love it! I bought this as a care package/random present for my sister in LA, and she got a kick out of it! Although apparently her car is currently beyond spot cleaning and needs a major wash. I guess she could have used this months ago.